Have you ever felt like you just NEEDED to do something, even though it was not mandatory or absolutely necessary or something? Well, I feel sort of like this now with the blog šŸ˜› I haven’t posted in so long that I feel obliged to write something before I head out for 5 days without internet.

Truth is, I’ve been meaning to write SOMETHING for awhile, but nothing comes out. I stop to think about what to write and eventually close the window when nothing comes to mind. Stupid writer’s block.

Then I decided today that I would just start typing and let the words come naturally. No thinking, no perfect structuring of sentences, just write write and write. Let’s see how this turns out.

So lately I feel like I’ve been pulled away from God – AGAIN (as if that is any surprise)! Notice the pattern? Away from strong support base = distance from God. I’m glad that I’m going back to Bordeaux this weekend for a spiritual refill. Being so weak spiritually I think it’s something I really need, to get back in touch with brothers and sisters in Christ and most importantly to be rewired to God.

How do you overcome these “breaks” from God? How do you make sure that you steer away from Satan’s temptations and that you stand firm in Christ even when you’re alone? Imagine that my main base is here and not Bordeaux; what would I have done? Would I still be a stray sheep? Would I even have come back to God?

Of course we may say that God would have had His plans laid out for me if that were the case, but I suppose now it is meaningless to pose hypothetical questions. Point is, I am still struggling with the problem of being away from a strong group of Christians.

Yes, I still do pray and I still read Our Daily Bread and I still do think about what God wants me to do on a daily basis. However, my prayers have been getting shorter and shorter and it sometimes feels a bit more “meh”. Also, I feel 239489% less willing to read the Bible here than when I was in Bordeaux. It seems so much harder to understand, as if I’m reading and the words just get flushed out from the back of my head.

Got any suggestions?

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