Interesting, thanks for the reply back XD I guess we all have had times in our lives where we “threw around” a friendship carelessly and ended up losing it, or losing touch and ended up just as acquaintances again, which is a really regretful thing. Through highschool and university, God has blessed me with several very close friends, and some that were further away. I’ve always wondered, if I had taken the time to truly nourish that friendship, to take time to build it and care for the other person, maybe today I would have more “close” friends, rather than a bunch that are at arm’s length.

I’ve been guilty of not nourishing all the friendships and many of them just withered and died on me. But with “real life” and all, schooling and now working, it gets harder and harder to set aside those precious moments for friends. To listen to them and to genuinely care for them. I imagine it would only get harder when you get a family and have kids, just because of all the attention that you would have to pay to them, it would leave you with very little time for friends.

I think your story about you and the Captain was really interesting – it’s incredible, the chemistry between human beings. We can get so caught up over something so menial, and blow the whole thing out of proportion. Although, your story had a happy ending (you guys are once again close friends), but not every story ends that way =(

I am now realizing more and more everyday, how important friendships are to me now. Not that I didn’t *care* about my friends prior to this point, but only now that everyone close seems to be drifting apart that I want to try and cling onto every strand. When I first started work last May, I was uber excited about befriending all my young coworkers, that it would be like meeting a bunch of friends in University again, we would hang out after work, talk about personal things and in general have a great time while working. I soon discovered I was just being naive, and in fact the real world didn’t operate that way. I had a co-worker who turned out to be very competitive, a bit power hungry and saw me as her direct competitor. Needless to say it made it hard for me to “befriend” her, I couldn’t tell when she would use the info I tell her against me. Let’s call her “B”

Another co-worker “A”, was always friendly to me. She “warned” me about the motives behind “B”‘s actions and told me to watch out, that they use to be friends until “B” backstabbed her, blah blah blah. I believe there are 2 sides to every story so I had to take her words with a hint of salt too. Just as I was starting to get close to “A” and think of her as my friend rather than just my colleague, she went all cold and bitter for a while. I was so CONFUSED, no idea what the hell is happening??!! Since those 2 incidents, I made up my mind that coworkers =/= friends. Friends are people you can spill your guts to, talk about random ramblings to and feel relaxed and comfortable while hanging out with them. Coworkers will always show a conflict of interest, and to an extent, can never reach the same level of trust.

Since last year, I have been so much more careful about my friendship, realizing that most of the closest friends I’ll have in life I’ve probably met already (ie. you lol). I want to learn to care more about others, and to an extent, that requires learning about SELFLESSNESS. Which, IMO, is a very difficult thing to learn because it goes against every cell’s intuition in your body. I certainly don’t want to throw my friendships careless around anymore. Which may also explain why Oliver’s actions (or lack of actions, I don’t know anymore) really does bother me – because I do consider him a very close friend. And when things like this happen, it leaves me baffled and confused.

Clearly, some more prayers are needed.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and reading about my rant =P It was very nice to get it all off my chest, and have you here to keep me from going insane!

=)

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